Well, here we are.  A lifetime up to this present spat up in a few 
fleeting words that in some perverse, unholy way attempt to illustrate what 
has become of what I see in the mirror every day.  I don't know why it is 
that I have this nature to feel the need to express and impose on you these 
visions of the places that I've come to know through my dreams and 
experiences, but I figure that it's just my function.  Tough break, being in 
the process of trying to complete yourself, while searching for the elusive 
meaning of life, all because you've been told that you've not already 
found it.  Extremely confused and growing weary of all the damned 
avenues of philosophy and of language barriers all together.  Tired of 
hearing myself talk about inexpressible sensations and trying to capture 
the feelings in words.  Good, bad, selfish, love, hate, existence, eternal, I, 
God, sanity, insanity, society, reality, death, birth, life: to hell with it all.  
I've eaten the words served to me and restructured them in an attempt to 
paint my own internal picture outwardly for the world to see and 
perceive... I've done this for my own inner discovery so that one day I 
might finally feel like I've done enough and accept rest.  But I see now 
that there is no escape.
	I tell you that I love you and this place that we are in because I 
have never before been on a mountain this high, and as we look at each 
other - there on the level that we've created, I, resorting back to 
foolishness, have attempted to label and articulate the feeling and have 
shattered the whole thing.  I tell you that these are my beliefs, that you 
don't feel that I am trying to pronounce my word as the almighty word of 
God, but the truth is, is that this is God.  Nothing more can ever exist, 
other than these ever-evolving eyes through which  we decide to look at 
this truth of our being here right now.  Aah!  I can't go on.  Here I am... 
existence on display and what do I say?  I'm talking and talking and...... 
why can't I just rest?

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16 Renford Road (four)
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